Week 27: Did You Think to Pray

July 31, 2017

Hello!!

It's that time of week again! This week was amazing...and full of many ups and downs (surprised? not really).

Sisters at the Temple

We had several heartbreaks this week. Towards the end of last week we saw tons of miracles and had tons of return appointments for this week and then every day this week as we went to these appointments we saw slowly but surely every single one of them fall through. I can't say I was surprised...it seems like the bane of every missionary's existence is trying to get people to keep appointments, but by the time Thursday rolled around and our final appointment had fallen through I could tell that it was weighing on Sister Rudd. I remember being a greenie and feeling like the world was falling apart and not knowing how to handle it...and it surprised me to see firsthand how much I've grown; how I was able to look at all of these fallen-through appointments as opportunities to go where the Lord needed us instead of disappointments. Did that make sense? Sister Rudd and I had a lot of really good conversations this week about following the Spirit and going where the Lord needed us to, even if we don't always understand why in that moment.

Another rough thing that happened was we were dropped by one of our investigators, C. We weren't surprised when it happened, she wasn't really studying as intensely as she could have been and she hadn't come to church yet...but it was still kind of an out-of-body experience sitting in her living room and her telling us that she wasn't interested at this time. We left her house and we were both like...what just happened to us? But we both feel strongly that we planted a seed and that the next set of missionaries will be able to help C in ways that we couldn't.

We also decided this week to back off of M. We have been trying to set up appointments for the past few weeks and this week he told us he's too busy getting ready for vacation...but he doesn't leave on vacation until the middle of August....haha so obviously he's avoiding us, so we just decided to give him some space. When he gets back from vacation we'll try again. But that was hard as well.

In a Priesthood blessing at the beginning of this transfer I was promised that as I turned to the Lord in prayer I would receive guidance and council over the course of this transfer. I have never been more reliant on prayer in my life and never more reliant than this week especially. I have truly felt an outpouring of the Spirit and the Lord's love this week more than ever before. As I turned to the Lord in prayer I felt my burdens being lifted and an overwhelming sense of peace and comfort. He knows each of us and wants to hear from us. I don't know why we sometimes treat prayer as a last-resort kind of thing...why wouldn't we want it to be our first resort? The Lord knows everything, including how to comfort us in our time of need. Prayer is amazing.

So this week, every time Sister Rudd and I had a question about where to go, or what to do, or what to say...we prayed. Every time we felt doubt and discouragement creep in, we prayed. As we did so, the miracles poured upon us.

The first came after we were dropped by C. We left C's home and got in the car and prayed together. As we were praying we received a text from a member who is the fellowship of one of our investigator families, the M’s. This family is AMAZING. They're devout Methodist and honestly the fact that they keep inviting us back is a miracle in it of itself. These past few weeks I've really been wondering what to do with them, if they're worth our time, if they're progressing...those kinds of things. We love them, but if they're not progressing then we need to spend our time elsewhere. This text we received said that the M’s LOVE our visits and look forward to learning more, and that they even want to come to church. I about fell over...the PROGRESS that they have made since the first time I visited their home is unreal. The first time I went there, V made it VERY clear that she was not interested in the Book of Mormon or church or anything...but slowly she started reading the BOM, and now for her to say she wants to come to church...absolutely amazing.

The second was really cool. We arrived at an investigator's house just in time to see him pulling out of his driveway. We sat in the car for a minute pondering what to do, and we prayed and felt like we should stay. So then we prayed AGAIN and asked Heavenly Father for the opportunity to visit with S. We went and knocked on his door, and he wasn't home...but as we were walking down the driveway he came back!! We asked him why he came back and he said "I don't know...I just felt like I should." He invited us in and we had a great visit. He asked us loads of questions about Utah, and after like 15 minutes of him asking question after question I was finally like, "S...are you planning a trip to Utah?" and he said he was haha. And then I asked when and he said "Next year, maybe fall." And as a joke I was like "Oh come visit me at school." and he was like "seriously?! That'd be awesome!!" and he got really excited, and then he started talking about how I could show him around. It was a really tender moment for me. It made me realize that the love between a missionary and an investigator isn't just one-sided, as it sometimes feels...these people love us too, and we are touching their lives. I'm so excited to take S on a tour of "Brigham Young's Univesity" (as he calls it) and I'm so excited for him to keep progressing in the gospel!

Companions at the Temple

The third and final miracle was amazing and ultra humbling for me. We had a night where we were working and every person we had planned for wasn't home...I started feeling like we weren't where the Lord needed us, so we decided to pray and ask for direction. As we were praying, the name of a family the ward council had asked us to stop by came into my mind clear as day. We finished praying and I turned to Sister Rudd and said "We need to go to the T’s." If I'm being totally honest, Sister Rudd didn't trust me. She kept saying "It just doesn't feel right." But I was like, no...Sister Rudd, I don't know why, but I KNOW we need to go to the T’s. We prayed again, and she still didn't feel it. So we prayed again, and she STILL didn't feel it. And at this point I was like, "Heavenly Father has already given us the answer. If we don't act on it then he'll stop giving us answers." and we went. She wasn't super happy haha, but we went anyways! We knocked on their door, and after a few minutes on the porch they invited us in. Sister T has endometriosis, and she is a single mom with two teenage daughters. She had a pretty big surgery last week, and has been trying to recover. We were sitting there talking and I don't remember how, but something her daughter said took me back to my junior year of high school, right after dad was diagnosed with cancer...and I realized that this family was experiencing many of the same emotions that my family had experienced. I turned to the daughter and I said "You know, my dad is in remission for cancer...I know what this is like for you," and this daughter just burst into tears. She had loads of questions about how my family managed, and about how I was able to put my trust in the Lord, etc. This daughter and her mom just sat there asking me question after question, and I was able to bear testimony of trials and of the Lord's plan for each of us. By the end of it, the Spirit in the room was so thick, and they were both in tears. They told us that we were an answer to their prayers and that the Lord truly had sent us to them. When we left, Sister Rudd was like "I think it was a little bit inspired that we went there tonight." Haha that was pretty funny. But it was SO humbling because it made it crystal clear to me that the reasons we experience things are 1) for ourselves or 2) for the benefit of other people. I'm constantly amazed at how much the Lord knows what He's doing. Everything we experience is for a reason...even if we don't always see it; the Lord has a massive plan for each and every one of us. I see that every day when I realize that the Lord sent me HERE, to Gilbert Arizona, to touch the lives of those I serve here.

Transfer 5 Planner

And finally....transfer news. Unfortunately...I am being transferred!! No one saw this coming! I don't even think President did...in interviews this transfer he told me that I was going to stay in this area for a long time, so I was settled in for the long haul. I'm so sad, I love this area and these people...S is going to cook us dinner tomorrow evening to say goodbye, and the members I've told are gutted...it's not going to be easy to leave. However, I feel at peace about it. I know that transfers are inspired and are part of the Lord's plan. I'm so excited to find out on Wednesday where I'm going and who my new companion will be...onward and upward!

I love you all!!

Sister Jacobson